Unobtanium

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Unobtanium
867.5309g/mol/uJ +2
+4


  Ume
-1
[ ? ] Poor metal:
Properties:
Unobtanium has properties!
Compounds:
Compounds are generally unavailable
Uses:
Speculative
Hazard:
wild goose chases


Important Note! Please read this first!

Note: this is a humorous test cluster, used for testing templates.

Unobtanium is an imaginary chemical element created by frission with phlogiston suspended in the ether, according to secret alchemical documents recently discovered in a cave in France. Unobtanium is generally not obtained by mining or smelting, but wishful thinking has proven useful. Deflogistrated (American spelling) Unobtanium is less easily refined, except at the expense of slender blue aliens...and their indigenous trees. The "Blue shirt" reserve military [1] has been mobilized and loaded into space shuttles. They will be shot into space shortly in order to help insure a reliable supply of unobtanium. Processes for purification of deflogistrated Unobtanium have remained a closely guarded trade secret of the Doo Chemical corporation.

Test /Properties page transclusion

Other, other, other things

Unobtanium has been used in manufacturing for many years to fabricate hard wired analog delays for product transmission lines. Unobtainum has a distinct odor especially when used scientifically.


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The above section is "transcluded" from Unobtanium/Properties

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Its properties were always so similar to the last chemical that occupied the test tube that chemists originally planned to name it Averagium. That plan miscarried when a technician broke the test tube and replaced it with one from the store room, but lost its label.

A famous Nobel prize non-winner in Utah has achieved cold fusion using Unobtanium dissolved in hyperbolium. Scientists have been unable to duplicate his results, except for one researcher in Montana whose lab exploded in a giant mushroom cloud. The U.S. Environmental Protection Agency said that luckily the winds blew all the radiation fallout into Canada. The Utah scientist says his critics are misreading the settings on their microwave ovens.

In a related serendipitous discovery, medical researchers searching for possible allergic reactions to various Unobtainic salts discovered it to be a reasonably efficacious treatment for hypochondria.

  1. (those military who are not themselves actually blue, but support the blue cause)