Talk:Rock the Vote: Difference between revisions
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imported>Doris Weil (New page: {{subpages}}) |
imported>Shamira Gelbman (first evaluation comments) |
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==First (instructor) evaluation comments== | |||
Hi Doris, | |||
Here are some some suggestions for further improvements to your encyclopedia entry draft: | |||
* You might flesh out the intro section a bit more, providing a more comprehensive overview of what the whole entry is about. On that note, you should replace the Microsoft stuff in the infobox with basic info about RTV. | |||
* The "History" section looks like it's off to a good start, though you might divide it into subsections to make its structure more apparent to readers. You might also include more specific information -- e.g. Which "members of the recording industry" were involved in the founding? What did youth voter turnout stats look like around 1990? | |||
* The "Current objectives and activities" section is very short. | |||
* In addition to listing RTV's current officers in the "Organizational structure" section, you might discuss its leadership roles and their responsibilities in more general terms. You might also say a little bit about its membership beyond the leadership level. | |||
* The "Achievements" section could be more detailed. It might be nice to include a table with youth voting statistics to help demonstrate the extent to which it's gone up since RTV got off the ground. | |||
* The "Public perceptions and controversies" section raises some interesting points; one thing that might help make them more compelling is to be more specific in naming sources of criticism and opposition. For example, you mention "another opposition group" -- you might as well say which group it was (and provide a source for its allegation). | |||
[[User:Shamira Gelbman|Shamira Gelbman]] 12:37, 3 October 2009 (UTC) | |||
==Second (peer) evaluation comments== | |||
Revision as of 07:37, 3 October 2009
First (instructor) evaluation comments
Hi Doris,
Here are some some suggestions for further improvements to your encyclopedia entry draft:
- You might flesh out the intro section a bit more, providing a more comprehensive overview of what the whole entry is about. On that note, you should replace the Microsoft stuff in the infobox with basic info about RTV.
- The "History" section looks like it's off to a good start, though you might divide it into subsections to make its structure more apparent to readers. You might also include more specific information -- e.g. Which "members of the recording industry" were involved in the founding? What did youth voter turnout stats look like around 1990?
- The "Current objectives and activities" section is very short.
- In addition to listing RTV's current officers in the "Organizational structure" section, you might discuss its leadership roles and their responsibilities in more general terms. You might also say a little bit about its membership beyond the leadership level.
- The "Achievements" section could be more detailed. It might be nice to include a table with youth voting statistics to help demonstrate the extent to which it's gone up since RTV got off the ground.
- The "Public perceptions and controversies" section raises some interesting points; one thing that might help make them more compelling is to be more specific in naming sources of criticism and opposition. For example, you mention "another opposition group" -- you might as well say which group it was (and provide a source for its allegation).
Shamira Gelbman 12:37, 3 October 2009 (UTC)