Talk:Drug treatments for obesity: Difference between revisions

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it seems like everything is going well, good team work! [[User:Celine Caquineau|Celine Caquineau]] 14:38, 21 October 2009 (UTC)
it seems like everything is going well, good team work! [[User:Celine Caquineau|Celine Caquineau]] 14:38, 21 October 2009 (UTC)
'''Your article so far:''' Overall a very good work! You have well understood the task, you show good organisation skills and very good team work with everybody contributing. Well done!
The direction and focus of your article are clear with the help of a good introduction and a well structured plan. You’ve kept in mind that this is an encyclopaedia article, the ‘scientific’ content is well balanced, not too simple not to complex and your writing style makes the article easy to follow by every readers.
I also appreciate that you are keeping an eye on the other articles ([[Diabetes]] and [[Food reward]]) so you can make links between yours and your peers articles.
Few points:
Im guessing that all the sections are not part of the introduction, modify the title fonts so they appear as separate sections.
You need to insert more references to the facts cited, especially in the first sections. Overall you need to be consistent in typing your references. They should appear in the text as number and in full in ‘References’ at the end of the article and use the Citizendium format. I’ve done an example in 'Peripheral drugs', have a look how I’ve done it.
The ‘Bibliography’ page should also be updated accordingly with a consistent format.
I think you can now move your pre-introduction comment (describing the task and who you are) to the top of the Talkpage after all your names.
Finally, don’t hesitate to move references to websites to the ‘External links’ page.
Again, nice work guys, looking forward to read your ‘final’ article. [[User:Celine Caquineau|Celine Caquineau]] 16:29, 28 October 2009 (UTC)

Revision as of 11:29, 28 October 2009

This article is developed but not approved.
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To learn how to update the categories for this article, see here. To update categories, edit the metadata template.
 Definition:  Treatments of obesity that are based on drugs. [d] [e]
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 Workgroup category:  Health Sciences [Editors asked to check categories]
 Talk Archive:  none  English language variant:  British English

Mark Cairns 14:38, 6 October 2009 (UTC) Rachael Kirkbride 14:46, 6 October 2009 (UTC) Bruce Traven McLintock 14:47, 6 October 2009 (UTC) Neil R. J. Watson 14:48, 6 October 2009 (UTC)

This is a fantastic start - very well done guys. An important issue to focus on is the link between mechanisms of action and physiology - for example on endocannabinoids- where are the CB1 receptors expressed, and how do we think their actions impact on feeding? Gareth Leng 09:26, 13 October 2009 (UTC)

Found a paper in TIPS that you may find interesting, Its called "BAT: a new target for human obesity?" Shane McSweeney 16:35, 13 October 2009 (UTC)

Im impressed, nice work! Celine Caquineau 09:23, 14 October 2009 (UTC)

it seems like everything is going well, good team work! Celine Caquineau 14:38, 21 October 2009 (UTC)

Your article so far: Overall a very good work! You have well understood the task, you show good organisation skills and very good team work with everybody contributing. Well done!

The direction and focus of your article are clear with the help of a good introduction and a well structured plan. You’ve kept in mind that this is an encyclopaedia article, the ‘scientific’ content is well balanced, not too simple not to complex and your writing style makes the article easy to follow by every readers.

I also appreciate that you are keeping an eye on the other articles (Diabetes and Food reward) so you can make links between yours and your peers articles.

Few points:

Im guessing that all the sections are not part of the introduction, modify the title fonts so they appear as separate sections.

You need to insert more references to the facts cited, especially in the first sections. Overall you need to be consistent in typing your references. They should appear in the text as number and in full in ‘References’ at the end of the article and use the Citizendium format. I’ve done an example in 'Peripheral drugs', have a look how I’ve done it. The ‘Bibliography’ page should also be updated accordingly with a consistent format.

I think you can now move your pre-introduction comment (describing the task and who you are) to the top of the Talkpage after all your names.

Finally, don’t hesitate to move references to websites to the ‘External links’ page.

Again, nice work guys, looking forward to read your ‘final’ article. Celine Caquineau 16:29, 28 October 2009 (UTC)

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