Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser

Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser

Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser (sometimes rendered as Grey Mouser) are a pair of characters created by the author Fritz Leiber. Their adventures are collected in a series of books varying in number depending on edition and publication.

They are a pair of hard-drinking, hard-fighting, woman-obsessed thieves, both with a finely-wrought sense of personal aesthetics and a complete inability to hold onto any of their plundered wealth. They are expert swordsmen, climbers, sailors, riders and practically any other skill that may come in handy for a plot device.

They live in an invented world called Nehwon, its name itself a homage to Erewhon. Much of the action takes place in the principal city Lankhmar.

The canonical series is:

1. Swords and Deviltry
   1. Induction
   2. The Snow Women
   3. The Unholy Grail
   4. Ill Met in Lankhmar
2. Swords Against Death
   1. The Circle Curse
   2. The Jewels in the Forest
   3. Thieves' House
   4. The Bleak Shore
   5. The Howling Tower
   6. The Sunken Land
   7. The Seven Black Priests
   8. Claws From The Night
   9. The Price of Pain-Ease
   10. Bazaar of the Bizarre
3. Swords in the Mist
   1. The Cloud of Hate
   2. Lean Times in Lankhmar
   3. Their Mistress, The Sea
   4. When The Sea-King's Away
   5. The Wrong Branch
   6. Adept's Gambit
4. Swords Against Wizardry
   1. In the Witch's Tent
   2. Stardock
   3. The Two Best Thieves in Lankhmar
   4. The Lords of Quarmall
5. The Swords of Lankhmar
   1. A complete novel, the first part of which contains the story Scylla's Daughter
6. Swords and Ice Magic
   1. The Sadness of the Executioner
   2. Beauty and the Beasts
   3. Trapped in the Shadowland
   4. The Bait
   5. Under the Thumbs of the Gods
   6. Trapped in the Sea of Stars
   7. The Frost Monstreme
   8. Rime Isle
7. The Knight and Knave of Swords
   1. Sea Magic
   2. The Mer She
   3. The Curse of the Smalls and the Stars
   4. The Mouser Goes Below

Fafhrd

Fafhrd is on the surface the stereotypical "northern barbarian". He is considerably taller than average; he usually has long, wild, red hair and beard (although see Lean Times in Lankhmar); he wears furs crudely cut and cured. He wields a hefty sword which he calls Graywand, and on occasion a dagger called Heartseeker. He has a predilection for older women, usually tall and rangy like himself, although he has been shown not to be particularly fussy in this regard.

His singing voice is better than average, pitched rather higher than would perhaps be expected for one so large; this is as a result of his training in early years to be a Skald.

His character is based on the conventional Nordic folk tradition, enhanced and carved for literary effect.

His parentage, upbringing and early life are depicted in the story The Snow Women.

The Gray Mouser

Only otherwise known by his childhood nickname "Mouse", the Gray Mouser appears never to have had a conventional name. Aspects of his early life, and how he turned out the way he did, are portrayed in the story The Unholy Grail.

He is a smallish, handsome, sly-looking and foppish man with an extreme streak of narcissism and egotism. He usually wears gray garments of fine cut, usually of ratskin and silk, manufactured and repaired by an erstwhile colleague in Lankhmar, Nattick Nimblefingers (who never actually appears in the Nehwon canon - his purpose in the plot is merely to provide a pretext for the Gray Mouser to appear his usual dapper self after an episode of considerable exertion and privation). He sports a long, thin blade which he calls Scalpel, and also a smaller dagger-like blade for his other hand, which he calls Cat's Claw.

His own sexual predilection is towards women rather younger than himself, to an extreme that in conventional Western terrestrial society would perhaps border on illegality.

Nehwon

Nehwon is the invented world in which all the action takes place (except for one story, Adept's Gambit, which oddly takes place in approximately the pre-Roman Middle East of our homeworld Earth itself, although not one which can be reliably historically placed). It roughly corresponds to the Iron Age period of Earth, in which technology is primitive, energy is generated by muscle-power and wood-burning, and transport is by horse and ship (propelled either by sails or by oars).

Magic works, when germane to the plot. Strange invented beasts populate it, like giant hot-blooded white-furred snakes, multi-headed plesiousaur-like sea-monsters and intelligent rats who walk upright and wear clothes.

Lankhmar

Lankhmar is the main city in Nehwon, in which much of the action takes place. It is noisy, smelly, anarchic, scruffy and crime-riddled, in other words, a perfect setting for tales of unbridled spooky swashbuckling. Significantly to the calling of both Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser, the Thieves' Guild is a powerful presence here, as is the Beggar's Guild. Early stories in the canon feature conflicts between the pair and the Thieves' Guild.

The Gods in Lankhmar (not to be confused with the Gods of Lankhmar) are multitudinous, and their relative power is determined by their position on Street of the Gods almost in the manner of a pop chart.

The Stories

Swords and Deviltry

Induction

A brief introduction to the world of Lankhmar and our main protagonists.

The Snow Women

In which Fafhrd is introduced. He is eighteen, and lives in a tent with his mother Mor, the acknowledged chief of the Snow Clan, a hidebound matriarchy dwelling in Cold Corner in the snowbound Cold Waste. He is tall, fit, intelligent, philosophical and skilful with the various tools of his environment. He is also a skilled singer and story-teller. His father, it turns out, has perished some years earlier while mountain-climbing.

The story opens with the arrival of a troupe of travelling players whose presence is barely tolerated by the womenfolk, but (in general) welcomed by the men of the clan, as it offers them the opportunity to escape for a while from the tyranny of the rule of the women. Fafhrd is forbidden to watch the show, not only by his youth but by his mother.

He has already fathered an as yet unborn child on his sweetheart Mara, and he is philosophically resigned to the fact that he is about to transfer his slavery from his mother to Mara. As the story opens, he is contented for this to happen, as he still enjoys his love-life with Mara.

However, an encounter with the intriguing Vlana, whom he rescues, is about to change all this. She is a good decade older than he, a performer in the troupe, and a victim (it will turn out) of certain political skullduggery between the Snow Clan and the management of the troupe.

Fafhrd and Vlana's relationship is illicit on many levels, mainly because in different ways both are in a kind of slavery. Both wish to escape this slavery, and see in each other a means by which to do so. They plan to flee south, go to Lanhkmar (probably), and live the free and happy life of vagabond performers, or something equally romatically alluring or whatever. However, what Fafhrd does not know is that he is but one of the possible means of Vlana's escape, and that he has several more-or-less deadly rivals for her affections. It transpires that she seems not to be particularly concerned exactly which of these rivals she ends up with.

Considerable entertaining mayhem later, Fafhrd sees Vlana flee on a stolen sleigh, with one of those rivals at her side. He follows on skis. This exciting pursuit requires his utmost skill and strength, as you would expect. He is just in time to thwart an ambush by other parties concerned in Vlana's future, which he does by exploiting his considerable reserves of cunning and skill. As you'd expect, the tale ends with Fafhrd and Vlana fleeing in the stolen sleigh, destination (eventually) Lankhmar.

The Unholy Grail

Mouse is a small, skinny orphan. He is apprentice to a wizard, Glavas Rho, whose magic is exclusively white (i.e. "good"). Mouse has, apparently, been experimenting with black, or course, as youngsters would. Hence he has already gained the soubriquet "gray", and indeed his clothing is gray, as described in the opening paragraph.

All is not right. Mouse has returned from a minor quest to find that Glavas Rho has been murdered by Janarrl, the local Duke, a thug, bully and bigot who despises magic in all its forms. The reason Janarrl has done this, and burned his woodland hut to the ground, is that he has discovered that his daughter Ivrian has also been secretly taking lessons from Glavas Rho. This is too much for Janarrl.

Ivrian is Mouse's sweetheart. They have met via Glavas Rho himself. She is also faint-hearted and somewhat cowardly, a bit of a milksop. Her mother, who died when Ivrian was younger, was a fit and outdoorsy type like her husband, but without the brutality of the latter.

Mouse suspects, with some reason, that Ivrian has in fact betrayed Glavas Rho, from fear of her father, who treats his daughter with contempt. He is equally concerned that she will in turn betray him. However, he has a plan of revenge of his own.

Using black magic (specifically, the pins-in-doll technique), he deliberately sets out to kill Duke Janarrl. This would be accomplished at great danger to his soul, which would forever after be tainted. However, he is thwarted, as demanded by the exigencies of the plot, by Ivrian. She has been followed to Mouse's lair, and so is the unwitting cause of Mouse's capture and imprisonment by Janarrl, as Mouse had all but expected. At this point he expresses his disgust at her cowardice and declares her as beneath even his hate.

However, he has another plan. He devises a black magical working which will rely upon Ivrian's presence in the torture chamber in which he is to be racked to death. What he intends to do is channel his suffering through Ivrian to her father as she sits at his side, dressed as she is in her mother's clothes.

Sure enough, this working is as successful as the reader would desire. Ivrian has redeemed herself in Mouse's eyes (although he is not blind to her character flaws), and they ride off into the night together.

Ill Met in Lankhmar

Inevitably, both kicking around in Lankhmar at the same time as they are, Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser are bound to meet. This they do, having both selected the same victims for a job, namely Sleyvas and Fissif. The latter are two thieves of the Thieves' Guild of Lankhmar, and have together just raided a local jeweller.

Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser duly rob those two thieves, during the course of which they impress each other with their skills at swordfighting. Each forms an instant liking for the other. Despite their differences, they see each other as a kindred spirit.

It's probably worth pointing out at this point that they have suspicions of being followed by something, having been spotted in their robbing of Sleyvas and Fissif, but (in order to fulfil the vicissitudes of the plot) they shrug this off. Instead of following this possibility up, they convene with copious quantities of alcohol at the Gray Mouser's place, a sumptuously furnished upper room behind the Silver Eel (the local hostelry) in a ramshackle tumbledown building that in modern society would be condemned as unsafe. Fafhrd has brought his current squeeze Vlana (see The Snow Women), and she meets the Mouser's girl Ivrian (see The Unholy Grail). Fafhrd, incidentally, identifies the Mouser as the perpetrator of a whole series of thefts of carpets, rugs, tapestries and so forth - everything, in fact, that provides the furnishings in which the Mouser keeps Ivrian in a state of cosseted seclusion.

The wine runs out, the tales get taller, the party rolls on. Vlana (as we have learned in The Snow Women) has a vendetta against the Thieves' Guild, and is disappointed in both of our heroes that they did not actually terminate the lives of both Sleyvas and Fissif when they could have done (the pair are actually not, in fact, that kind of person). After some argument and self-aggrandisement from both our heroes, they succumb to Vlana's taunts, and embark (drunk as they are) to go and bring back the head of Krovas, the chief of the Thieves' Guild.

Predictable and gloriously entertaining mayhem ensues, in which the pair disguise themselves as beggars from the Beggars' Guild and sneak into the headquarters of the Thieves' Guild, as planned. They are discovered before having accomplished their aim, and barely escape intact, having failed to achieve their aim.

Returning to the Mouser's abode, they find their loves murdered. They had been followed, after all, by an animal familiar of Sleyvas and Fissif. The deed had been done by magic while Fafhrd and the Mouser were causing trouble at the HQ. In fact, they realise that they had actually been viewing the adept Hristomilo performing that act, while they were sneaking about.

Overcome by madness of grief and rage, Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser burn down the Mouser's dwelling, then go out to do the same to the Thieves' Guild headquarters. They are but partially successful; several thieves die that night, including Hristomilo and one or two others who perhaps did not so deserve. Krovas remains alive.

Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser walk off into the night, still burdened by their grief, and walk out of Lankhmar, swearing never to return.

Swords Against Death

The Circle Curse

(This is a linking piece between Ill Met in Lankhmar and the stories that are to follow.)

Burdened by grief, Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser stride out of Lankhmar, vowing never to return.

As they walk down the road, they are hailed by a voice from an odd little hut on stilts by the side of the road, which is keeping pace with them by walking down the side of the road on those stilts. The voice entreats them, in rhyme, to return to Lankhmar. They both demur (in somewhat pompous language), citing their disgust at what has happened to their loves (see Ill Met in Lankhmar), and continue down the road.

So ends their first encounter with the wizard Sheelba of the Eyeless Face.

There follows a brief account of their next three years, as they embark on the next phase of their career of questionable legality, morality and ethics, during which they roam widely across the world of Nehwon, honing their skills and broadening their experiences.

We focus in on their conversation late one night, as they settle down to sleep on their bedrolls. They lament the fact that they still can not forget their lost loves. Fafhrd in particular complains about being tired of life (which, considering he is still barely in his twenties, is some achievement).

At this point, a gentle cough from the cave behind them makes them jump. Here begins their first encounter with the wizard Ningauble of the Seven Eyes. He (or she, or it - they are not entirely sure) also suggests that they may achieve closure in Lankhmar, despite their vow, pointing out that vows are made to be broken when the time's right.

And sure enough, after some futile argument, the pair indeed decide to return to Lankhmar after all, where they decide to stay for a while, making it the base for their adventuring.

The Jewels in the Forest

(This, under the title "Two Sought Adventure" in 1939, was Fritz Leiber's first publication.)

On the strength of some library research, Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser are off to a strange treasure house in a forest clearing, in which they have heard are some exotic and probably valuable gems, ready to be plundered. They have a document describing it in advertising language.

Before the story has had a chance to properly get under way, our pair are attacked (ineffectually) from ambush. No worries, it takes more than a party of eight to bring down our heroes from ambush.

They arrive at the clearing which they have worked out is their destination. They enter a peasant hut, imposing themselves upon the inhabitants, paying them for the inconvenience. They make a quick visit to the treasure house in the approaching twilight, just to reassure themselves that they have arrived at the right place. Then they return to the peasants' hut where they stay the night, learning that the treasure house is a place to be shunned, as it offers as yet undefined dangers.

After a night's sleep, they make their preparations and off they go, but half way there they have an encounter with the daughter of the household, who tells them about a gray giant who clubs things to death. But of course she's never seen it.

Their next obstacle is the band of men who ambushed them the previous day. It turns out that they are also after the treasure in this house. Mouser knows them of old - they are the men of Lord Rannarsh. Combat (leavened by trickery) ensues, during which the band is routed. (But no doubt when they've regrouped they'll be back.)

Finally they enter the treasure house. The first thing of note that they see is a skull and a broken human skeleton. Halfway up the stairs is another one, on which the Mouser finds another document, in language similar to theirs, bragging of this treasure house. This gives them cause to question whether they have been lured there, as if by bait, to their deaths.

But no matter. Here they are, and here they are going to plunder. On a higher storey they encounter Lord Rannarsh who is terrified of something, but dies in combat with the Mouser before he can elucidate his fears. That terror suddenly descends on our two heroes, who are beginning to wonder what sort of treasure house (or temple?) this actually is. But they're good, they don't succumb to this terror, their desire for this treasure is too great. Next they meet a "holy man" who has been here forty years, who babbles a lot, and then he dies, horribly, offstage, crushed to death by something mysterious.

But they are here for a reason, so our two heroes set to work picking the black tarry stuff holding in a certain stone with the inscription specifying it as where the treasure is located. For the Mouser, terror turns to revulsion and nausea, so he takes a break to get some fresh air through the window - and he sees the girl from earlier. But while he's frantically trying to get out of the house so as to rescue her (he's convinced she's in terrible danger), Fafhrd has got the stone out and has grasped the biggest of the array of diamonds swimming in a sea of black metallic liquid.

Everything goes predictably mental at that point. Clearly the house is a beast and the gems are its brains. The dead people have been clubbed to death by stones from the house itself. Fafhrd somehow gets out, frightened out of his wits, but not before the diamond he filched is destroyed. And sure enough, the house itself collapses into rubble.

Our two heroes, somewhat battered, limp back to civilisation.

Thieves' House

Krovas commissions Fissif to steal the skull of Ohmphal, and a pair of jewel-encrusted sets of handbones, which were apparently stolen from the Thieves' Guild some time ago. Privy to their conversation on this matter is a certain red-headed wench, whose identity has not at this stage been revealed. Fissif in turn employs Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser to help him in this enterprise, intending to double-cross them out of the share of the profits.

Cut to a few weeks later. Fissif returns to the Thieves's Guild HQ with the goods, hotly pursued by Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser, who have indeed been cheated by Fissif. Fully cognizant of the dangers, they chase him into the HQ and (having avoided several traps) are just in time to watch the red-headed girl make off with the skull and handbones. They give chase, but are frustrated by a heavy curtain and trapdoor.

Returning to Krovas, they discover he has been strangled to death, by person or persons as yet unknown. Mindful of their situation, they conceal themselves on hearing approaching voices. It's Sleyvas, with a fearful Fissif. The latter tells his story, up to where the bones themselves killed Krovas. Sleyvas isn't sure whether to buy this (thinking that Fissif himself may have killed Krovas), but at that point he is made aware that Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser are still in the vicinity.

Entertaining mayhem, during which Fafhrd gets hit on the head. The two make the best escape they can through the maze that is the Thieves' House, during which time Fafhrd suffers more cracks to the head, stupefying him further. The pair separate, agreeing to meet at the Silver Eel.

Fafhrd gets hopelessly lost, having had a bad time because of his head injury. Eventually he finds himself in a deep hot dusty dungeon, completely dark. He must be delirious, because he fancies he can hear ghostly skeletons talking to him, demanding that he return the Skull of Ohmphal to them - by next midnight. If not, he is a dead man. In terror, Fafhrd flees, somehow managing to find his way out, only to be cold-cocked by Fissif, who brings him all trussed up to Sleyvas.

Not being able to make head or tail of what Fafhrd is deliriously mumbling except "next midnight", they send a message to the Gray Mouser, who is of course waiting in the Silver Eel, that unless he returns the skull by next midnight they would kill Fafhrd, slowly.

Mouser disguises himself as an old hag who tells fortunes, and blags his way into the apartments of Ivlis (the red-haired girl of the first scene). After all, that's where the skull is. He notices that her room is a mirror-image counterpart to that of Krovas, and between them no doubt is the passage through which Ivlis (Krovas's erstwhile mistress) passes. During the following mayhem he finds the skull, binds Ivlis in her torn-up garments and finds the secret passage.

Meanwhile Fafhrd, as midnight approaches, is before the Thieves' Guild council, He talks about those deep cellars he had found himself in, awaking the secret fears and superstitions of the thieves (except for Sleyvas, who is too hard-headed to be superstitious). Spinning out his tale as long as he can, he listens for the grate of bone on stone. At the crucial moment the Mouser arrives, and with his voice impersonates Ohmphal - but then Ivlis gets in on the act, and all the thieves get to see is the Mouser (still in his old-woman costume) wrestling with Ivlis, who has got free, tumbling through the curtains in the alcove.

Further mayhem, during which time Sleyvas smashes the skull to prove that the superstition is groundless, and is of course killed by the ancient skeletons of the thieves from below who wanted Ohmphal's skull returned to them. A fitting end.

The Bleak Shore

Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser have been bragging over a gaming table in the Silver Eel about how they have cheated death may times. A small pale man in a cowl ensorcels them with the words "The Bleak Shore." At which point our heroes get up, go to the dock, board Fafhrd's sloop (complete with crew conveniently aboard) and sail off into the west.

Nothing is heard for months until Ourph, their (usually) faithful Mingol sidekick returns to Lankhmar with a tale of how they sailed ever Westward until they arrived at the eponymous place, all black basalt and gray rocks. Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser disembark and set out on foot, sending the sloop back with Ourph and the rest of the crew to Lankhmar. Ourph arrives back (having wrecked the ship and lost the crew) to tell the tale.

We return to Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser, who meet the pale man in the cowl, who is a sorcerer whose calling is to hypnotise heroes and lure them to this place to feed the shambling, reptilian caricatures of fighting men that are just now hatching out of the black eggs that lie all around. After the usual mayhem, the Mouser works out what to do to stop this wasteful cycle of destruction (and indeed to save their very skins) and in a timely manner kills the sorcerer. Eggs and reptiles crumble to dust.

Their next task, of course, is work out how to get home.

The Howling Tower

In the middle of nowhere, on their way home, Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser find themselves on a rolling grassy plain, on which they can hear the howling of wolves. Their local guide talks of a haunted tower nearby which is supposed to be the source of this howling. Despite his warnings and fears, they camp overnight. Next morning the guide has vanished, taking his pay with him.

The pair continue travelling through this lonely land, and at the end of another day they see this tower on the horizon, and as evening falls the howling starts again. No matter; they pitch camp. Fafhrd is in a jolly mood while Mouser is glum and apprehensive. Next morning it's Fafhrd who has vanished.

Bah, thinks Mouser, he's gone to the tower, the nincompoop. Off he goes himself at a trot, and arrives (after a fairly uneventful journey) at his destination by nightfall (it's further away than he thought). And the tower still emits that spooky howling.

After nearly having been crushed to death by a stone toppling from the battlements (enough to sharpen the senses of the most sluggish), he enters the tower and finds both the guide and Fafhrd. Both are heavily bandaged, but those of the guide are caked in dried blood, and he turns out to be dead. Fafhrd is completely uninjured, but comatose, with his sword placed neatly beside him.

A mad old man emerges, who (after the usual argy-bargy) explains that Fafhrd is in the shadowlands fighting the wolves that are making all this howling. The bandages are to stop Fafhrd, when he is injured in his battle with them, from bleeding to death too soon. He had reached the shadowlands by drinking a drug which the old man has made him drink.

The situation has come about from an incident in the old man's youth (who it appears had been born mad) when he locked all his dogs in a cellar without food or water and inured himself to their howling. And even though the dogs had all died, their howling continued. So he sends them heroes to fight so as to assuage his madness. And Fafhrd is just the latest of these. And as he watches, a wound appears on Fafhrd's wrist, under the bandages.

Mouser is sent in to follow Fafhrd, to help him out. But of course he forces the old man to drink some of the drug as well (wouldn't you?), despite his revulsion against such a callous act (Mouser has a secret compassionate nature). No matter. Into the shadowlands they go. And, as you would hope and expect, the dogs in the shadowland tear the old man to pieces and thereby find their revenge.

Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser recover, and are once more set on their way home.

The Sunken Land

The pair are on a boat, having sailed the Outer Sea, and are about to pass into the Inner Sea and thence home to Lankhmar. Fafhrd is excited about having caught a fish with a fancy ring in its belly, with the insignia of Simorgya, the Atlantis of Nehwon. This is a legend known to Fafhrd, although the Mouser is unfamiliar.

In due course a ship comes sailing out of nowhere, crewed by people of Fafhrd's genotype. Fafhrd, as though ensorcelled, boards this ship, and (after some minor mayhem) takes the place of the one he has hauled overboard while climbing on. The captain of this ship, Lavis Laerk, demands silence from his oarsmen and feeds them nothing but wine.

Simorgya has risen from the waves, and Lavis Laerk is set on raiding it. Fafhrd is suspected of being a Simoryan spy (he's wearing the ring, for a start), but this matters not - after all, he can tell them where the loot is hidden.

On to Simorgya. A predictable raiding operation undergone, an equally predictable spring trap, from which (with the Mouser's help - he has followed in the sloop) Fafhrd escapes in the de rigueur nick of time. The members of Lavis Laerk's crew all perish, of course, under the attack of the creatures that have been unleashed. Simorgya sinks, and the pair are once more on their way.

The Seven Black Priests

The pair are raiding a mountain enclave somewhere up North, populated by a handful of black priests (it's their skin colour, they all hail from the hot southern land of Klesh) who are guarding a set of the usual priceless gemstones.

Considerable mayhem, during which the priests are killed one by one, and a particular gem is filched by our pair. Fafhrd is the one to carry it, but it is clear as the tale unfolds that it appears to be controlling him. After having spent considerable time leading the way back off the mountain, it turns out that they have gone in a great big circle and are back where they started. Fafhrd by this time is completely under the control of the gem, which is the brain of the mountain, which is indeed a living entity which needs new priests (the previous ones have been killed - see earlier in this tale).

Mouser rises to the occasion and performs the obvious act - he shatters the gemstone with his sword. The mountain erupts, the pair flee successfully.

Claws From the Night

We are back in Lankhmar, finally.

There is a strange spate of thefts, perpetrated by birds, to such an extent that people are taking extreme defensive measures (in particular, women have taken to wearing cages so as to protect their jewellery from attack in the street). Some people have even been killed (supposedly by poison on the claws of the birds).

Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser return, as unobtrusively as possible in this time of disquiet, and inquire about a fabulous ruby that the jeweller Muulsh is rumoured to be about to give to his petty, spoiled, shrewish wife Atya. The Mouser secretly spies upon an amusing domestic scene featuring a dominance/submission game in which Atya has (as you would expect) the upper hand. Atya keeps several cages populated by exotic birds, upon which she dotes. This is clearly a bone of contention between her and Muulsh. As a bribe to stop her abusing him further, Muulsh offers her the ruby.

At this point it is clear to Mouser that he and Fafhrd are not the only ones after this gem. There are another two ne'er-do-wells in the vicinity who are equally intent on heisting this ruby. But before any of them can put their plans into effect, an ugly black bird swoops in through the open window and makes off with it. (Oh, what woe to Muulsh, because this, naturally, is his fault.)

Mouser catches up with Fafhrd who, meanwhile, has a tame snow-eagle of his own, Kooskra, who has successfully brought down the black bird which has stolen the gem. Mouser cuts open the black bird to find the ruby in its gullet. Fafhrd holds it up in triumph, but - d'oh! - a second black bird snatches it out of his hand and is off with it. Kooskra gives chase, but it appears that the first black bird must have had poisoned claws, and Kooskra dies from a scratch sustained (which grieves Fafhrd), and this time the black bird escapes.

The pair have seen where the black bird went with the gem - to the top of a particular tower - so off they go. Fafhrd climbs the tower while Mouser waits below. Fafhrd breaks in, while Mouser finds himself under attack outside (but we'll come back to him later).

Fafhrd, after some mayhem, finds himself captured and tied to a chair, along with another thief, Stravas. The tower is an old temple of Tyaa, the ancient bird-goddess, outlawed in Lankhmar for centuries. The goddess Tyaa has condemned these two to death by bird for having the temerity to steal things of hers (such is her hypocrisy).

Mouser manages to affect a rescue. Tyaa is of course the obnoxious Atya. Her imposture revealed, Atya flees Lankhmar, taking her birds with her, although she is believed by many to have drowned in the river Hlal.

The Price of Pain-Ease

Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser are still mourning the loss of Vlana and Ivrian.

While drunk one night they steal a house and plant it in the burnt-out lot where Mouser's first Lankhmar dwelling was (see Ill Met in Lankhmar). They inhabit either end, and infuse it with their own particular personalities. And during the next few months, they progressively go mad. This is caused by the fact that each experiences the ghost of their lost love. Each keeps this secret from the other, probably a bad move.

This comes to a head when the Mouser sees an apparition of Ivrian, an experience which upsets him acutely. Rushing to Fafhrd's part of the house, he discovers that the latter has vanished. According to the houseboy at the Silver Eel, Fafhrd has charged off Eastwards on horseback - on a horse that has, indeed, suddenly magically appeared. Similarly, one has just appeared for the Mouser, who wastes no time leaping aboard and haring off after him.

The horse, in fact, takes him to the dwelling of Sheelba of the Eyeless Face.

Bazaar of the Bizarre

WORK IN PROGRESS - TIME IS SHORT.